Things I learned as Bishop

I posted this list on my blog several years ago and it came up in conversation recently.  I thought I would post it again several of these were reinforced in the past few months as scoutmaster.

1. Young men consider throwing knives at each others feet and appropriate activity to pass the time.
2. Some members consider "Book of Mormon stories" a racist song.
3. You cant give sisters the priesthood even when they ask for it.
4. Letting people know they are getting a new calling or released usually goes better if they know before it is announced sacrement meeting.
5. It is always a good idea to have a plan B when the youth are in charge of cooking on a camp out.
6. Girls camp different than boys.  When an small animal is found they run screaming away from it.  Boys run screaming towards it with clubs and knives drawn.
7. When giving approval to the young men to build a fire, size, location and fuel all need to be specified.
8. The most memorable combined activities involve the police showing up with guns drawn.
9. Its better to confess your own transgressions than those of other ward members.
10. When people are in your office crying, laughter is not always the best medicine.
11. You know fast and testimony has gone horribly wrong when the police show up and remove people.