The Fam

The Fam
Family Photos Fall 2015

Saturday, July 6, 2013

Arranged marriages...the way it should be!

I sit in my living room at 11:30 at night it is 80 degrees outside and there is a wonderful breeze moving through our home.  It made me think of what a great life we have and how I have just taken care of one more part of my duties as a father.  Mayson my oldest son is spending a couple of weeks at scout camp as a counselor in training.  In his absence we were blessed with a visit from an old high school friend of mine and her daughter.  (For the sake of her daughter and sheer terror this post will cause this wonderfully talented 14 year old girl I will simply refer to her as Jujubee.)  They joined us for the 4th of July and we had a great visit together.  In our conversations it was decided that Mayson and Jujubee needed to get married.  After a few minutes of haggling over a dowry (she is and 8 cow wife) terms were accepted the parents fist bumped in agreement and it was decided that we would inform the kids of their impending engagement.  Mayson has not yet been told, however this is the 3rd such marriage I have arranged for him.  It’s good to have options.  I am confident he will not be surprised and will happily accept this arrangement. Miss Jujubee was startled and to my great surprise wanted nothing to do with this arrangement.  We pointed out all the obvious perks:

·         Awesome in-laws that don’t overstep their boundaries.

·         Jujubee is just a hair over 5 foot 1 and Mayson is pushing 6 foot 4 so it would introduce height into their gene pool.

·         The families are both from the Pacific Northwest so it would be easy to see extended family.

·         Jujubees dad would be the proud owner of 8 new cows (she claims it should have been 10).
·         These 2 lovebirds have 6 years to get to know each other and warm up to the idea of getting married.  This is all at a comfortable distance of 500 miles so we insure a temple wedding.

The discussion and wedding planning went on through the evening the entire time Jujubee wanted nothing to do with it.  She had wisely decided to leave the boring details of her wedding, honeymoon and life to her more wise and experienced parents and soon to be in-laws.  We discussed possible dates and decided a fall wedding would be best so Jujubee would not be too hot in her dress.  There will be a coin toss to determine if it is going to be the Boise or Seattle temple. 

I need to set a countdown banner on my blog.  Mayson will be getting home from his mission is 6 years so clear your calendar for a wedding in Fall of 2019.  It should be Awesome!  After all of this work it dawned on me that I have 4 other kids I need to get working on.  I have 2 daughters and I like cows and all but a power boat or jet skis would be just as nice when it comes to a dowry.  So if there are any takers out there or you would like to put in your bids let me know.  We have weddings to plan and kids to get matched up. 

Oh and it would be best if you did not talk to my wife Rhonda about this.  I don’t want to weigh her down with details and she will start in on some talk about free agency, it is their life and for me to stop trying to get camping equipment in exchange for our kids hand in marriage. 

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