I am sitting in the Airport getting ready to get on a plane to Wichita Kansas. I have never been to Wichita not that I have anything against it, the opportunity for our paths to cross has never really come up until now.
We had a retirement party for my dad over the weekend. Most of my brothers and sisters were there. As we were talking it struck me that real life is always way more funny and way more difficult that TV or movies make it out to be. I was talking to one of my nephews and he started to tell fart jokes. This is an eternal right of passage. Boys will tell the same jokes generation after generation and they will be just as funny as they were the first time that they were told. This got me thinking. There is a childrens book “Everybody Poops” which helps us draw the conclusion everybody farts. I walked in and saw part of an episode of Opera my wife was watching with some famous Dr. Oz on it. The episode was about farting and poop. Heck if I knew that Opera talked about bodily functions I probably would have watched her show. (I did some checking she did not normally talk about poop this was just a special or something”) But anyway on this episode they said that the normal person tooted 17 times per day. That means that when you are reading this most likely you have already tooted today.
In honor of my nephew and his choice in jokes I have decided to dedicate and entire week of posts to terds honking for the right of way that’s right. You have heard of sweeps week, finals week and shark week. This is going to be fart week. It is expected to be all true stories and just as distasteful as it sounds. And much like real life all true stories because you just can make this stuff up.
Oh and in advance I have not discussed this with my wife who would most likely show a high level of objections to this line of writing, even though I have personal knowledge she lets the occasional fart go. Proof this is not just a guy thing.