If you end up getting to travel a lot for work you really begin to appreciate some of the simple things in life, frequent flyer miles, rental car upgrades, platinum level status with hotel chains and best of all expert traveler lines at the airport. These are lines that are created specifically for those who travel often and know the boarding process well enough to do it in our sleep. Not all airports offer this service the ones who do have earned a special place in my heart.
It seems that whenever they don’t have one of these lines I end up getting behind a Darwin Award waiting to happen. Let me give you an example. Last summer my daughter Regann and I went on a trip together. It was a wonderful time and we were on our way home standing in line to go through a security check point. The line we were in split and much to Regann’s surprise we took the longer of the two lines. She asked me why we took the obviously longer line and was concerned we would miss our flight. I explained that this line was faster even though there were more people. This was due to the fact that one passenger two people up from us, was going to slow the other line down exponentially. This women looked like a hybrid Lady Gaga and Boy George. She was carrying 3-4 bags and had on more jewelry than Mr. T. She had these platform heels that where very clearly not going to come off easily. All of this added together equals inept traveler who thinks metal detectors don’t really work.
It was comical to watch. As she approached the x-ray machines she needed 5 bins and tried to have her pet dog x-rayed. Her shoes required the help of a total stranger behind her to be removed. She went through the metal detector without removing any of her jewelry. She would then take off 1-2 pieces think it was enough and try again. After the third try TSA pulled her out of the line to manually process her much to her displeasure but to the applause of those around her. We were through security and walking away by the time this happened. Regann stared in disbelief. She said does that happen a lot? I said often enough to recognize that train wreck before it happened. So a word to the wise:
· Metal detectors really do work
· Slip on shoes are great to travel in
· Keep it to a single carry on
· Only try to x-ray your dog in the vets office
The rest of us would sincerely appreciate your help on this and it will keep you from unknowingly become fodder for future blog posts.